sah depa tak dak kerja!

• mai nak habaq pasai manusia2 yang sah tak dak kerja......hari ni wa pakai baju kurung yang berusia 4 tahun yang dah amat lama tak dipakai sebab silk dan wa tak suka pakai silk. Wa pakai sebab setelah hampir satu jam melangut depan closet mau cari baju yang dengang penuh harapang menggunung dah bergosok tapi tak jugak jumpa2 walaupun bukak katup closet 10 kali..So wa jumpa ini baju kurung yang dah gosok - obviously oleh khadam2 terdahulu dan mengambil keputusang pakai je lah labu in order tak payah gosok baju.........

• Bila wa tiba opis di subuh sepiee, dah ada satu mamat dok tend to the school's garden and terus cakap "Amboi...pakai baju baru hari ni"......"Ishk...dak lah, baju 4 tahun lalu yang beli kat Langkawi masa kita pi bengkel dulu tu..." (why the hell do I need to explain????????)

• Pas tu satu mamat pulak tiba dengan motor dan berkata "baju baru nampak...."...."Ishk...dak lah...baru jumpa dalam almari..."

• pas tu satu minah pulak tiba "la...tak kenai sapa tadi sebab nampak slim (get it? slim...slim....jangan mareee...) cantiknya baju baru.....ishkkkk....baguhi no dr dok maintain badan..."

• Semua ini berlaku dalam perjalanang dari kereta ke punch card yang tidak mengambil masa lebih dari 6 minit dan itu baru terserempak dengan tiga manusia yang bekerja di main opis.

• Kesimpulangnya, manusia2 di sini sama ada :
• a) tak dak kerja sebab tu tahu sapa pakai baju baru
• b) memang suka kat wa and dok perati wa hari2 - NOT!
• c) tahu yang wa pakai baju yang sama sahaja sebab tu bila pakai baju lain depa kalut
• d) tahu wa tak dak baju!!!!! uwarghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

My name is RM7.06

• I used to be Ms.RM26.10 but now I have been reduced to Ms.RM7.06.

• Mari dengar cerita yang paling menyentuh hati untuk suku pertama tahun ini. Setelah hampir satu bulan saya merana hidup berduka lara tidur tidak lena dan makan caca merba sambil menggigau masuk penjara, maka pada hari ini saya diistiharkan sudah "fit to lead a normal life" (of course we need to define what "normal" constitutes but we don't want to get into that as this bipolar and dualism can get us into real detail once we start the debate so neber mind...we shall deal with that the next time "when" an idiot or some idiot elements jump in......)

• Saya memohon untuk membuat pinjaman peribadi atas sebab2 yang amat peribadi walaupun ramai kekawang sudah tahu sebab peribadi itu memandangkan kekawang saya sangat peribadi kepada saya (God, please not make my mom ask for the passbook. Amen....:)

• Bagaimanapun, permohonan saya ditolak oleh sebuah bank atas alasan "credit problem"! WHAT?WHAT?I HAVE SOME CREDIT PROBLEM AND I DONT EVEN KNOW ABBOURRTTIT???? Bloody hell!(allowed to curse in this blog cause kids are not allowed in - no elements of discrimination here but some stuff are best left to matured people.....errrrr......) The stupid bank can't tell which financial institution claimed that. Only the stupid system stated so. Stupid bank. Who created the system? An alien from Jupiter and can't be contacted because you don't have roaming service? Big idiot number ONE! And that stupid bank did not even inform me to check with Bank Negara for my credit status. No wonder your bank is so terperosok and nobody wants to do business with you!!!

• Suddenly I remembered one bitter episode with one bank over my credit card that I terminated before leaving for NZ. When I came back, I received a letter stating that I owed them some RM160 over donno what. Reluctantly, I paid (more than the due amount) as they said that I will be blacklisted if not doing so. I paid, with my pseudo-lawyer letter, stated that if they do not delist me, I will take legal action against them. They did not reply so I assumed that done deal. So, when this crap appeared, I called the credit manager and she bloody told me that I still owe them RM26.10 for some stupid legal fees which I do not understand for the life of me!!! And I said "Why didn't someone write to me and tell me so?" to which she had no answer.. ..manager some more...Ohh..I forgot that they put idiots as managers, where else would they put it right????? So I quickly went to deposit the money (of course more than the amount due which I definitely tidak halalkan for the obvious reason...yahoooooooooooooo) and asked that idiot to faxs me the release letter which she did.

• Then, I went to that bank and applied for the loan just to test the theory of me having bad credit. Yahooooooo- rejected again due to "SPECIAL ATTENTION' status on my name. I went gilaness. What crap is this. I have enough crap at the opis la....Already got that release letter from your lame bank what.....No, that's not that. "You owe 3 months of housing loan securites" so said the idiot from that lame bank now BIG IDIOT NUMBER TWO. I was shocked! Went to my housing loan bank and was told of no such issue and they even wrote a letter to that bank to state my "clean credit status".

• Went again to BIG IDIOT NUMBER TWO with the letter and was told that was not the case. Wrongly stated. Che Bi tahap dewata tak? Still under 'SPECIAL ATTENTION" and was asked to go to Bank Negara to check my status. Well, at least they gave suggestion to me. OK - less 1cm as an idiot.

• Hit on the road and went to Bank Negara branch and was told that "kami tak boleh check kat sini serta merta. Hanya di HQ yang boleh. Kalau kat sini kena isi borang dan akan mengambil masa 3 minggu". Why the hell do you have cawangan for idiot if not untuk menyenangkan pelanggan? Obviously not.......obviously not......Wa mau naik atas kaunter lompat2 pung ada polis bodo sedang nganga tepi pintu.......

• Finally today, managed to go to Bank Negara besaq and asked for my credit status. Was given the statement and the culprit that gave me a month of living hell. What the ()**(&^%%$$*&*)_)_+???? I have paid all the StanChart credit card and why am I being listed under special attention??? Of course I want special attention la but from boyfrengs and tokfrengs not Bank Negara, idiot!!!!

• Fetched my brother and we went to StanChart branch at Kota Damansara yang selalu "tak dak orang" so said him. True enough. We were greeted by a very friendly staff who asked us to sit down while she look into my account. When I saw "amount due RM7.06" on the screen, I screamed my lung out and that woman sudah takut and my brother also almost lari keluaq............I was fuming with madness and nasib baik urat tengkuk tidak putus or any of the vein meletup. Swear to God I was bloody mad beyond words. The staff calmed me down and wanted to go get drinks for me. RM7.06? RM7.06? RM7.06? RM7.06? She quickly filled in the form and said it will be send to the HQ as they can't do at the branch and promised me it will be cleared within a month and the release letter will be mailed to me ASAP. It better be!!!!!!

• You know the feeling of waiting for your GRE's exam result and TOEFL exam result and application to do your Masters and PhD at your chosen university? That was the exact feeling that I went thru over the last one month. I wanted so much to know that everytime I think about it, my heart beat a skip. Thank God it did not stop alltogether.

• And now, my heart beat harder as I am anxious to write a real nasty letter to Stanchart, the Press and the Finance Minstry over the stupid credit system of balcklisting people. Kalo wa hutang RM2 juta tak pa la lu mau blacklist wa but for RM7.06? Ko orang memang THE BIGGEST IDIOT!!!!!!!! - With due respect to sedara mara, kekawang and sedara mara kekawang yang kerja di financial institutions. Wa akan tunggu surat release dahulu sebelum wa tulis itu nasty letter.

• And BIG THANK YOU to Chor yang meminta bantuan her jet setter sister, NA yang bersungguh-sungguh mencuba membantu wa dengan memberi laluan untuk berurusan. Appreciate that very much.

-ms.RM7.06-

Ko memang kebal

• Kat opis ni, memang disahkan secara terang-terangan dan didokemuntasi dalam agenda mesyuarat bahawa ada "confirmed idiot" yang kebal and "u can't touch me..ha ha ha!!!" The biggest boss (by the virtue of body size and power but not necessarily brain - that's obvious, ain't it) has spoken. "Adalah dalam bidang kuasa saya untuk membuat keputusan untuk memberikan perlanjutan kontrak kepada mana-mana staf kontrak dan apakala saya tidak dapat membuat keputusan, maka barulah saya perlu merujuk kepada bahagian atau exco untuk membantu saya. Unless and otherwise, it is my perogative".

• PTUI...PTUI...PTUI..!!!!!!!!!!!

• Mungkinkah kalau di train monyet atau che bi untuk bekerja di sini, mereka juga mampu melakukannya, mungkin lebih baik dari idiot kontrak yang "ishkkkkkkkk...panjangnya umuq no...bila gamaknya nak che mpus.........."

• -ms.fantasy on flesh-

Gue mau bakaq lu...................

• Ketika dan saat ini, satu-satunya elemen yang gue paling menyampah dan rasa nak pi bakaq besar-besaran sampai habuk pun tak tinggai adalah Institusi Perbankan. Tapi gue tak tau bank mana yang harus gue bakaq.............uwarghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....tak pernah dalam hidup ku ini terjadi. Yang lagi gue rasa cinabeng p______ a____ is the fact that gue tak tau siapakah punya angkara nesta ini....uwarghhhhhhhhhhh............awas itu bank bila gue tahu!!!!!!!!

• Sama seperti gue tak tau siapakah yang mengadu domba dan membuat fitnah tidak berasas (ada tak fitnah berasas???) mengenai gue kepada big boss sehingga wa dipanggil untuk "membela diri" atau "disiksa"????? Gue memang tak tau sapa - but that is much easier because I can narrow it to "certain" character at the office yang sebelum ini pun pernah melakukan pekerjaan terkutuk yang sama. Masalahnya, gue tak leh pi bakaq rambut dia sebab rambut dia dah sedikit so thrill nya amat kurang..............uwargghhhhhhhhhhhh................

• Petang ini gue akan "chair" satu meeteng dan gue akan belasah semua orang separa mati. If I get the crap form the big boss because of you people, , you people better get the same crap too. If I go down the drain, I will not go down alone. Watch out people - gue yang stress tahap dewata is all out to get all of you - why should I suffer alone! HUH!!!! idiots! Idiots! Idiots!! Why can't they just go jump in the lake and not come back??????????????

• Sebenaqnya gue dah buat resolusi untuk drop everything off and ignore everything/everybody like hell for my life is fragile and I need not spend it on idiots. I don't want to die because of them - of course I die because my ajal dah tiba but I don't want them to be the contributing factor!!! Tapi bila gue tiba sahaja opis and otw lalu tepi bank, darah gue terus naik ke langit biru......Someone said, "u mengajar Teknik Berfikir dan Komunikasi, so apply lah all the theories and concepts to help overcome the issues". Well - if only life is as simple as that.......................mengong!!!!!

• Yesterday gue EL sebab gue malas mau datang opis dan tengok muka idiots. Nampaknya setiap minggu gue EL...wakakkakakaakkakak....................................

• Sekarang gue mau pi minum kopi mahai yang membahagiakan gue.............

Nasib ku yg dot! dot!

Yesterday I heard rumour about what will be happening to myself ..... from two sources. And this morning, I heard it again ... Don't want to believe it.... tulung! tulung! Half day gone...
All day rasa berat hati and tak sedap hati... went down to canteen.... 1.05pm And as I didn't heard anything about the rumourl, i kata maybe tak betul.. and this person told me, I heard it from the horse mouth laaaaaaaaaaaa oh tolonggggggggg

Tengah tengok lauk, suddenly two gas cylinder fell from its trolley and bam! bam! bam! kena ankle ku... mak aiii melalak wa kat canteen tu, nasib baik lelaki idaman takde kat situ... kalu tak malu aje.. wa dah teresak-esak.... so ada org taruk ais ... la ni wa jalan dengkut! dengkut! Bodoh punya orang angkut tong gas ........ bodus! bodus! bodus!

2.30pm My boss told me some news...... makkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk tulung... its true... I am clueless and do not know what to do now?????

Kengkawang... wa kena lose weight fast!! any offer to help out??

Ms Rumour Monger aka Ms Pumpkin Hater

p/s selain dari mamat angkut tong yang bodoh itu, takde sapa lagi yang bodoh dalam cerita ini, kecuali gue kelihatan bodoh keriau kesakitan kat kantin.... ankle wa dah le memang dah kena tukar .. kena lak camni. Mana nak control macho

Hanya Tuhan Yang Maha Mengetahui.....

• Ini adalah satu posting yang melancholic.........

• Went home last nite with a huge kerapah on my mind and on almost dead body. Before I left for home, I decided that I want to go watch a movie with a certain person - just for the heck of it. I am no movie person - I don't have that kind of attention for visual images but I can read throughout the days and nights - non-stop. I am a reading person - I also used to be a shopping person until I went to New Zealand and came back with a new perspective on the definition of shopping. Plus the fact that I am a "miskin" person now. Soon, I will jatuh ke tahap "daif". Mayhaps, it is not the new perspective after all - its the miskin thingy :)

• Anyway, when I reached home, I was so bloody tired and plonked onto the sofa and went to the la la land without even realizing it. But again, since when do we realize that we have been transported to the la la land? We just go..............When I woke it, it was already Maghrib and then I consulted a certain person if that person would like to go to the movie and that person said can't as already planned to meet with someone . Neber mind, I said - I go alone. Called another friend and asked him if he is at home as am going to this coffee joint in front of his apartment and he can join me but he said that a friend just came and going off to dinner. "Lain kali, ko cakap la awal2...ko ingat aku concierge ke dok terpacak kat rumah je tak pi mana2....ha ha ha......." Got ready, all dressed up and suddenly rasa penat gila and tak larat nak drive. So changed back to my loyal tshirt and sat at the balcony feeling so "what-the-hell-is-happening-to once-a wonderful-life". Why am I being tested time and again with shits, craps and idiots? (Ohhhh...for the record, yesterday was on of the most shitty day whereby you were told that you were not doing your job effectively and you should not do this and that and all the shits that come with it. I don't want this bloody "job" to begin withhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! uwargghhhhhhh...)

• Wanted to speak to someone but I donno who as I don't even know what to say anymore.....felt more shitty and crappy and all the works......But God works in a strange way......my mobile rang and a familiar name appeared (kalo tak familiar, ko tak dak la dalam list phone wa! mengong! mengong!) My favourite ex-student! Yippeeeeee.....we joked and lawak bodo and spoke serious issues and exchanged perspectives on life and its wonders and all......She even said "can I call you by other name like Datuk Paduka?" ha ha ha and we laughed like mad......(jangan lupo.....nama eden ado Datuk Paduka kat dopan...ehhh...bila kome nak panggil eden datuk paduko.....wakakakakkakakak....)

• An hour of laughter make me feel better and ready to conquer more shits and kill more idiots.......whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.....................

• In the final analysis, hanya Tuhan yang Maha Mengetahui............Thank you God for the good life and awesome people......and also thank you for idiots and morons for they make me feel brilliant and cultured and awesome and on top of the world!!!!!!!!!! Yahooooooooooooooooooooo

Are u an idiot?

• HARRRROOOOOOOO.......aku hanya pencinta wanita dan bukan buaya...ehhhhh...silap lagu......aku memang menyampah kat idiots dan morons...................

• Welcome! Welcome! Welcome! As stated by my partner in crime, this blog is not created by idiots but meant for idiots....ha ha ha.....errr....let me repharse that - this blog is meant to vent out our dissatisfaction and unhappiness created by idiots who somehow rather managed to "test" out our sanity and well-being. There are many authors/editors of this blog so the views are very non-patisan. Tapi blog ini ngak akan dibaca oleh manusia internasional sebab tajuknya gitu Malaya dan Indon ya......ngapa apain.......kita coba2 duluin.......ishkk....awat pulak gue ngomong Indon ni walaupun mai dari Jerlun........opppsss....tercakap pulak asal usul I.....:)

• Anyways, gue ngak mau bicarain apa2in lagi sebab gue sangatlah mengantuk after such a traumatic day today, jadik gue mau pulangin dan krohhhhhhhhhhhh sebentarin dan malam ini, gue mau nonton movie bagi menghilangkan perasaang mau siram "idiots" dengan ayaq hangat menggelegak nooooooooooooooo............Kapan2in.....jangan kapan kuuuuuuuu.........Ta ra......................